Listen: We know Yankee Stadium is a memorial to all that is great in baseball of time gone by. And that’s fantastic, really. But last night’s ESPN-ification of an event that absolutely everyone knew was coming — and during a meaningless game, no less — made us sick. It felt like the Yankees were leaving [...]

Does anyone know? We haven’t really been paying attention, and all we know is that Michael Phelps’ run to eight medals is complete and he’s a national treasure and maybe The Greatest Athlete of All-Time, depending on who you ask. The bad part is we don’t really care. Sure, Phelps’ accomplishments are certainly impressive, but [...]

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We love the third person. We believe all athletes should be required, by law, to refer to themselves only in the third person. Not only would this provide for lots and lots of hilarity, but it would really help clarify a lot of their statements. We bring this up, of course, because Plaxico Burress referred [...]

We’re done whining about the Brett Favre thing for now, so we’ll focus our attention today on the one guy who’s saga has lasted longer and irritated more viciously than Favre’s, Roger Clemens. Today, the Rocket’s lawyer, whose name is Rusty Hardin, filed a 97-page report to kick off Clemens’ defamation case against Brian McNamee. [...]

Wow. After all that talk, we really didn’t see this coming. Now we’re conflicted. As Jets fans but Favre haters, what are we to do? Favre’s an upgrade over whoever the Jets were going to trot out at starting quarterback. Is he a solid plan for the future? Not at 39 with an undisclosed number [...]

So Brett Favre turned down the Packers’ offer of $20 million to stay the hell out of training camp. Then he refused to talk to the Jets, one of the teams in hottest pursuit of The Most Overrated Quarterback of All-Time. Then he leaks word that he wants to play for the Vikings, which has [...]

Jason Giambi shaved his mustache yesterday, a tragic day for facial-hair enthusiasts but a good one for those who wish Jason Giambi would just shut up and go take walks and hit home runs and stop bothering us with his thongs and mustache and nonsense. We used to love mustaches. Really. They’re totally hilarious, and [...]

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