Andy and Mo lead Yanks to 5-2 victory and trip to the World Series; Realizing he knows full well what it’s like to celebrate with a ridiculously hot woman, Jeter’s beer goggles take the road less traveled.

Jets use bumbling Raiders to get back on track with 38-0 stomping; Shifty RB Washington lost for season when he jukes his fibula in half.

G-Men stifled by Cardinals defense in 24-17 loss; Arizona QB Kurt Warner credits the win fully to his teammates on the other side of the ball… and Jesus.  Obviously.

Sabathia wins ALCS MVP; Ace pitcher earns award over A-Rod thanks to tie-breaking vote that determined he would shield Fox’s cameras from champagne damage more efficiently.

Former Mets GM Steve Philips dismissed from position at ESPN following sex scandal; Long after general managing days, Philips shows he is still of the mentality that it’s okay to pay an exorbitant price to land a career ruining schlub.