Mets able to avoid arbitration with Church and Pagan; Outfielders sign one year deals that guarantee each will play at least 5 games before severely injuring themselves.

Yankees avoid arbitration with Nady and Cabrera; Outfielders reach one year deals that guarantee us another season of John Sterling screaming “X marks the spot!” and a bit more “Melky being Melky” before he’s inevitably sent down to the minors.

Islanders lose DiPietro for the year to knee injury; Team confident franchise goalie will heal fully sometime before his 15 year contract is up.

Kirk Radomski admits he believes Brian McNamee over Roger Clemens; “Who can you believe if not me?” Radomski asked, “I mean after all, I was the one selling the drugs… I even went to the pharmacy to pick up Roger’s medication for the ear infection he had on his forehead.”

Two Cardinals fans cited for burning cheers into Donovan McNabb’s front lawn; McNabb points out that if he was willing to put up with home vandalism and constant danger he’d just have his offseason home in Philadelphia.