Barack Obama victorious in historic Presidential election; Pundits say McCain made classic mistake of sleeping on opponent, looking ahead to next election.

Knicks will pay $21.9 million salary rather than waive, buy out, or trade Marbury; Will likely offer $5 million bonus if he positions himself discreetly amongst the crowd rather than sitting awkwardly at the end of the bench during games.

In another move away from the big free agent spending of their recent past the Yankees declined to pick up the options on two such players, Jason Giambi and Carl Pavano; The freed cap space will assure that the Yankees can throw their hat in the ring for free agents Mark Teixeira, CC Sabathia, A.J. Burnett and Jake Peavy.

Suffering first major injury of his long and historic career, Devils’ goalie Martin Brodeur will miss 3-4 months due to an elbow injury; Stars center Sean Avery has reportedly booked trip for day of Brodeur’s surgery, planning to stand directly in front of doctor the entire time, waiving his stick wildly while yelling obscenities.

Nets scorched at home by visiting Suns; First exhilarating chapter of the Lopez brothers professional showdown closes to a draw, with each scoring 2 points in twenty minutes of play.