Police report from Isiah Thomas incident released with name redacted; Gives distinct impression that he was in fact the victim though, as the statement makes note of “(Blank) offering an overweight paramedic a 4 year, $82 million contract.”

Rangers win again to set mark for second most wins in one month in team history; Tie record for fewest people noticing.

Philadelphians handling victory with all of the refinement and tact of the good citizens of Sodom and Gomorrah.

Reigning AP College Basketball Player of the Year Tyler Hansbrough is out of practice indefinitely, suffering from a stress reaction condition in his leg.  The condition, which can be a precursor to a stress fracture if improperly treated, is most often caused by unbridled intensity and/or deck jumping.