Phillies possible clinching game over Rays suspended by rain;  The Almighty shows mercy to the innocents of the town by buying them time to evacuate before victorious Phillie fans drown the city in beer, flames and blood.

Steelers says Manning tipped them off to goal line play in the 2nd quarter; Defensive end Brett Keisel said he knew the Giants were running their “32″ play behind the right guard when Eli help up three fingers on one hand and two on the other, and yelled out “Thiiiis many!!!”

Knicks waive Ewing Jr. to finalize regular season roster;  While they liked his play overall, he lacked the offensive polish and the necessary amount of skull tattoos to fit in with the team’s scheme for ’08-’09.

49ers reportedly interested in Condoleezza Rice for vital position;  Interim head coach Mike Singletary feels she will be a much more team-oriented tight end than Vernon Davis.

Umpires admit second missed call in World Series; Confess that had they taken the time to smell Evan Longoria’s glove and/or check it for skid marks they would have seen that he had clearly tagged Jimmy Rollins out.