No outtakes today — everything we filmed actually made it into the show for once. So here are some jokes that didn’t get filmed:

The Mets enter the second half riding a nine-game winning streak and 19 1/3 scoreless innings from their bullpen. Billy Wagner will do his best to end both tonight in Cincinnati.

Danilo Gallinari, the Italian guy the Knicks drafted, is already hurt and shut down for summer league with a sore back. “I never experienced in my life this type of soreness,” he said. Hey kid, just wait until the season starts and you have to carry Eddy Curry.

More midseason report cards:

Carlos Beltran: B – You’re hitting again, and we love the fact that you basically told Jimmy Rollins to F-off early in the season.

Mike Pelfrey: B+ – Chewing on baby pacifiers: bad. Throwing shutouts: good.

Billy Wagner: C+ – At least the All-Star Game doesn’t actually count, this time or any time.

Hideki Matsui and Johnny Damon: Incomplete – You’ve got to stop hanging around the bar and drinking the Moises Alou Kool-Aid.

Overall, the Nooner recognizes a boring first half on the field for the NY Nines and a wonderful one off the field. A-Rod and Willie — thanks for the wackiness. We look forward to pennant chases, local papers acting like it’s Armageddon whenever there’s a single loss, and A-Rod continuing to provide us with more material than we can possibly handle.