Convicted steroid dealer Kirk Radomski, who recently provided the government with receipts linking Roger Clemens and others to shipments of HGH, claims to have run across the evidence while moving his television.

“My TV broke and I said, ‘Damn, I got to get it off the dresser.  And it was right there”

Radomski’s chance discovery has opened the eyes of fellow pariah Brian McNamee, who realized he may also have incriminating tidbits laying around his house that could help in his case against Clemens.  Here is what he’s run across so far:

• In the sleeve of his Mindy McCready Sings the Holiday Hits album, lewd photos of the Rocket giving the thumbs up while the now infamous Country singer holds up her birth certificate revealing she is only 15 years old
• At the bottom of his cookie jar, an original reel of the Zapruder film that shows Clemens was indeed on the grassy knoll
• In his toilet tank, the severed third ear that at one time protruded from the forehead of Roger Clemens
• While playing his vinyl copy of the Beatles White Album backwards, hidden auditory assertion that Roger Clemens was, in fact, the Walrus
• In between his couch cushions, Roger’s Gold Membership discount card for the HGH Wholesale Emporium

Mr. Clemens, I am no legal expert and this is just a suggestion, but it may be time to consider dropping the defamation suit.

First, some cut jokes:

The National League got so desperate, manager Clint Hurdle even considered using David Wright as an emergency relief pitcher. When asked how Fred and Jeff Wilpon would react if he were to pitch, Wright said: “I just hope that they were asleep.” Just like everyone else.

The lengthy All-Star Game must have been torture for play-by-play man Joe Buck, who has previously admitted to not really liking baseball that much. A good way to put the nail in that coffin? Spending five hours in small room with Tim McCarver.

And now, the outtakes:

Honestly, what did we say? The All-Star Game was a boring, prolonged lovefest for Yankee Stadium — something we’ve had plenty of already in New York this year — hosted by a dude who doesn’t even really like baseball.

At least Sheryl Crow showed up, because at some point Sheryl Crow became the official chick-rocker of professional sports. What was the last major sporting event she wasn’t at? Maybe Sheryl Crow’s just a really famous groupie, albeit one we must begrudgingly admit has some talent.

The best part about Crow’s presence is it let us slip a Lance Armstrong joke into today’s episode, which you can watch by clicking that play button the video on the right. Maybe the no-balls thing was a cheap shot, but Lance Armstrong’s slow and steady fall from grace has been one of the most hilarious developments in a sport full of liars and cheaters and hilarious developments. It turns out every single person who has ever gotten on a bicycle has doped in some way or another — from Armstrong to Floyd Landis to that Jamaican dude who rides around the city pumping reggae from his pimped-out cruiser bike.

The troubling thing is that everyone seems to think Lance Armstrong defeated the odds to win all those bike races. Beating cancer is great, but don’t tell me that having one ball is a disadvantage in cycling. Have you ever even ridden a bike? The hardest part, by far, is figuring out how to manipulate the family jewels around that horribly uncomfortable seat. So we’re all proud of Lance Armstrong for beating death, but not for beating a bunch of other druggies and lying liars in a stupid race that no one outside of Europe cares about.

After 15 innings and nearly 5 hours of play, the marathon that was the 2008 All-Star game finally came to end on a sac fly off the bat of Texas Rangers shortstop Michael Young.  Commissioner Bud Selig was just relieved he didn’t have to implement the yet to be used, highly controversial, 16th inning knife-fight rules in order to avoid a lackluster tie.

Alex Rodriguez handled the All-Star media’s questions of his personal life with grace and composure on Tuesday, pointing out that “everyone has distractions,” and “everyone goes through personal issues.”  Which reminds us that at their core, professional athletes are regular people too.  After all, who among us can’t identify with having hundreds of millions of dollars in jeopardy thanks to our extra-marital, rock star affairs?

The 2008 MLB All-Star parade down 6th avenue, the largest gathering of Hall of Famers in league history, is said to have drawn nearly one million fans into the streets of New York City.  Although to be fair, roughly 100,000 of them were already there in the form of hobos and street preachers.

The government has reportedly received receipts from former New York Mets clubhouse employee and known steroid dealer Kirk Radomski that prove he shipped a package containing HGH to the home of Roger Clemens roughly 5 years ago.  While some speculate that the shipment may have been for Roger’s wife Debbie, others close to Clemens assert that the Rocket was actually a closet Mets fan and was having Radomski send him clandestine Shea Stadium souvenirs.

After losing yet another All-Star game, pushing their futility streak to 12 in a row, the National League will likely be looking for a scapegoat.  They could try to pin it on Dan Uggla’s 3 errors, but what about that pitcher who totally wussed out?  Yeah, he really screwed them.